There is a God up there somewhere. I can't prove to you guys but I know that there is a God up there. The reason why it is true is that I am always in trouble and I have no one to turn to. God saved me. I can tell you that. How would you think if you are in desperate need of help and wished someone is there to help you. Where is everybody? Where are your friends? Who are you going to turn to?
God is the answer. It does not matter which religion you are. Please, trust me. There is a God up there guiding all of us. It is so happened that I go to church and pray everyday to God. Well, I have to say that sometimes I don't. That is the problem. Oh well, I guess that one is really sad and down, you would not have the mood to do so.
I still believe that there is a God up there looking down on its people and guiding them to the correct path. Before someone were to accept Him, he or she would have to have faith in Him. Faith is important in life, not just religion. You got to have utmost faith in Him, allowing Him to guide you through your life. It is difficult but if you have faith and trust Him, you will be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I do have problems. It is a normal thing. Well, who can tell me that they do not have problems in their life? If you do, I wish you good and you are blessed. In that case, you should be rejoicing and pray to the Lord!!!
If you do have problems, pray to God. Open your heart and your mind to Him. If you need help, I will always help you spiritually. After all, we are human being and we should trust and help each other.
I do feel that if you have a will, there will be a way to succeed and overcome the existing problem. You got to have the faith and trust in youself and also the Lord.
I do have a friend whom I've known for many years. In fact we known since we were in primary school. After we have graduated from high school, we were still in contact as we only stayed a few rows of houses away from each other.
She has a lot of problems. Not that I don't have but I am trying to help other people too. I will do my best to help people with all my heart and soul. She was having a tough time. Her family was in the mist of a total meltdown. Her father was gettting ready to divorce her mom at that time. Since she is the eldest siblings, she was under pressure from her parents in trying to patch things up.
Not only did she has pressure from her parents, she also has pressure from her work place too. She was constantly unhappy working at her present job at that time. I could remember that she would always spend time staying overnight in my house and she would be alright the next morning.
I used to remember that I would offer her everything including extertainment in which I would talk to her the whole night until she is ready to go to bed. The next day she would be alright. She has seen a few doctors and from the description of those pills which was given to her by her doctors, it looks that she is suffering from depression. I was really hoping that she would get better by always being with her whenever I can and talked to her.
One example would be where she would just give me a call and the next thing I know is that I will be talking to her infront of a mamk stall. The conversation will go on for a fw hours until the wee hours in the morning before she finally said...' Lets go home'.
Mind you, it would have been going on for months and months until I could not remember for how long. Oh yes, it was going for about two to three years before she snapped. What do I mean when I said she snapped is that she suddenly had this fobia of going back to her house. She could not take the pressure anymore.
I have offered her to stay in my house for sometime and she was really happy. In fact, she only went back when I feel that she is mentally sound. I can remember that she has invited me over for her birthday and not her then boyfriend. I could not think why but hey, it is good that someone appreciates me for a start. She is very kind to me too. She would lend me her car whenever I need the car to fetch my then girlfriend. She is really nice to me.
All changes when I came over to UK to study. I tried to contact her but I received no answer and I Don't know what has happened until two months later...
She jumped off a twelve story building infront of her parents. I cried. I really cried. I cried because I was not there to comfort her not to take her own life. I blame myself for not getting in touch with her. I could not do anything at that moment. I don't know what to do but I went to see a pastor. From there I got back my faith in the Lord. Until now, I wished I would have the opportunity to see Chow Earn Ting in my dream. If I could, I really want her to know that I would have done a lot of things but I was incapable of doing so. If only I could help her... I am really sorry...
Please forgive me...
I have lost a really good friend. A friend who has shown me unconditional love and there she went away. Life is just unfair. It is not what she was supposed to do. She could have seek consultation with a specialist but she did not. I don't know what can I do as I was so far away from her. I hope that she is doing good Up there. Sometimes I just hope that I can see her in my dream and that I would want to tell her how much I cherished her as my friend and until now I still could not forgive myself for letting her commit suicide.
Rest in Peace Chow Earn Ting. You left me with a big hole in my heart since 2002, you know?
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